All the Things

skrambled: polygonfighter: The phrase “No amount of skill will protect you from the sheer luck of a...

Sun, 24 Jun 2018 21:46:50 -0400

polygonfighter:

The phrase “No amount of skill will protect you from the sheer luck of a chronic dumbass” popped into my head and if that aint a Big Mood™ i dunno what is

Dungeons and Dragons: a summary

binches: dirt1: My name is bastard, I’m 23, I sell healing crystals in the back of my truck, and I...

Sun, 24 Jun 2018 21:45:47 -0400

binches:

dirt1:

My name is bastard, I’m 23, I sell healing crystals in the back of my truck, and I activate almonds for a living, my salary is 1 million dollars

this was my favourite episode of house hunters

everythingstarstuff: that’s me

Sun, 24 Jun 2018 21:45:35 -0400

everythingstarstuff:

that’s me

theartofanimation: ömer tunç -...

Sun, 24 Jun 2018 21:45:22 -0400

theartofanimation:

ömer tunç - https://www.youtube.com/channel/UChIIDpMXWF0jCgfseg5WpXw/videos - https://www.instagram.com/kalmahul - https://www.facebook.com/omertunc1313 - https://www.behance.net/omertunc - http://drawcrowd.com/mertun13 - http://gallery.wacom.com/omertunc - https://artlords.com/u/omertunc - http://omertunc.deviantart.com

bible-of-fun: Now that’s a crossover i want to see

Sun, 24 Jun 2018 18:58:05 -0400

bible-of-fun:

Now that’s a crossover i want to see

hotcommunist: its-a-panda-emic: hotcommunist: hotcommunist: hotcommunist: hotcommunist: some...

Sun, 24 Jun 2018 18:57:44 -0400

hotcommunist:

its-a-panda-emic:

hotcommunist:

hotcommunist:

hotcommunist:

hotcommunist:

some asshole: you can’t just say everything is gay because-

me, pointing to a big lobster I’ve just seen scuttle under a big rock: lesbian

same asshole: actually animals don’t have a concept of-

me, gently holding the lobster claw: wife

still the same asshole, trembling in fear: why does your beautiful lobster wife have a hammer

my beautiful lobster wife: *kills him*

me: oh fuck I need to pay rent :/

my beautiful lobster wife, who has doubled in size from how much I love her: *eats my landlord*

Isn’t this the plot to Clifford the Big Red Dog

no. it’s the plot to valentina the big antifa lobster, though.

thecollectibles:Swords by Noa Ikeda

Fri, 22 Jun 2018 14:21:52 -0400

thecollectibles:

Swords by Noa Ikeda

ceptart: Monument of the Warrior Kingby Veli Nyström

Fri, 22 Jun 2018 14:19:24 -0400

ceptart:

Monument of the Warrior King
by Veli Nyström

backonrepeat:Critical Role - Yasha and Molly, Circus Besties

Fri, 22 Jun 2018 14:14:12 -0400

backonrepeat:

Critical Role - Yasha and Molly, Circus Besties

Photo

Fri, 22 Jun 2018 14:13:47 -0400

mxrvel-peter-parker: credit

Thu, 21 Jun 2018 15:25:41 -0400

mxrvel-peter-parker:

credit

audreyii-fic: oxford-haze: eowyn-daughterofkings: aatrunko: l...

Thu, 21 Jun 2018 13:40:42 -0400

audreyii-fic:

oxford-haze:

eowyn-daughterofkings:

aatrunko:

lizziekeiper:

frankenwhale:

oddlyclad:

xcgirl08:

#cinematic masterpiece

#I secretly rate every action packed film 0-the mummy

Every once in a great while, I will tell somebody “You know, nasty little fellows such as yourself always get their comeuppance.”

…And then I’ll be sad, because they have no idea what I’m talking about.

I only gamble with my life, never my money.

The Mummy fandom on Tumblr is hella strong

What up mummy fandom I didn’t know existed! Loved this movie. Need to watch it again.

I quote “You’re on the wrong side of the river” constantly.

I’m going to grad school soon to be a librarian and I can’t wait to get drunk and quote all of Evy’s lines.

I’m an archaeology student and I recently re-watched this and the instant they made it clear that it was set in the 1920s I was completely cool with everything about it because archaeology in the 1920s was mostly drinking and blowing things up.

archaeology in the 1920s was mostly drinking and blowing things up

goodguydashura: the-mighty-birdy: hong-meiling-official: greenwithenby: greenwithenby: People...

Thu, 21 Jun 2018 13:28:33 -0400

goodguydashura:

the-mighty-birdy:

hong-meiling-official:

greenwithenby:

greenwithenby:

People who prefer hot weather: Snow and ice are a pain, and the cold is just kind of uncomfortable even when you wrap up, you know?

People who prefer cold weather: MY SKIN LITERALLY MELTS OFF EVERY SUMMER I AM A FUCKING HUMAN SOUP AS WE SPEAK

you wouldn’t believe how many people reblogged this to whine about hot weather in the tags.

too cold? put on another layer!

too hot? change into thinner clothes!

still too cold? put on another layer!

still too hot? uh, get naked I guess?

still too cold? put on another layer!

still too hot? Ţ̡̜̮̗̟̯͘ͅA̛͈͎̤͙̳̦̱̜̺̪K̢̻̥̥̥̪̙̜̩̗̼̤̻̻͖͍̜͈͉͠ͅE̟͕̩͔̪͓͔̥̦͇̣͇̳͕͉͜ͅ ̠̝̥̖̭̦̼́͝O̩̦͓̠͉̲̲̱̪̹̻̼̭̯͎͈̕͢F̷̸̢̛̙͇͔̜̙̮̗̲̤͇̯͡F̧̨̱̤̲̫͕͔̼̭͙̠̙͙̹̻ͅ ҉̫̠͓̙̠͔̕͜͠Y͡҉̴̘̭̬̳́O̶̶̧͚̞̣̯̩̫̜̩͉̤͎͖̖͟ͅU̶̵̺̠̪̘̱̮̮̙̻͈̣̦̭͠͝͞R̨҉̦̺͓̩̺͖̘̪̥̺͚̱͚͔̪͓̖̰ ̷̸̺͇̳͇̖̥̻̳͚̗̥͙̪̣́S̡̞̳͖̭̯͉̻̠͔̥̹̫̣̼̹͇͜K͏̧͍̪̗̖̜̫̙̱̫͈̟̝̮͈̻̺̯̟̠̀Į̧̙͙͔̠͖̟̕͝Ǹ͖͎̳͍̪̱̞͇̺̘̩͘͜͠

The cold is easily shut out, the heat is inescapable hell

THE TRUTH COMES OUT.

Avoidance techniques for the cold:

-more coats, fire, hot food and drink, stay inside, fuzzy sweaters, ear muffs, become a burrito

Avoidance techniques for heat:

-die, I guess.

I guess I’ll just die

teamundraws: leveling up

Tue, 19 Jun 2018 14:45:22 -0400

teamundraws:

leveling up

prokopetz: transhumanist-viking: prokopetz: prokopetz: Magic systems in many niche tabletop RPGs...

Tue, 19 Jun 2018 03:49:26 -0400

prokopetz:

transhumanist-viking:

prokopetz:

prokopetz:

Magic systems in many niche tabletop RPGs posit that magic is empowered by social transgression, in the sense that it’s not the nature of the particular transgression that matters - save perhaps insofar as it resonates with the desired effect, of course - but merely the magnitude of the transgression in question that’s important.

An obvious yet curiously rarely explored implication of this is that worn or carried magic items logically ought to be more powerful the more offensively tasteless and unfashionable they are.

(Another rarely explored implication is that it may be possible to compare the magnitude of seemingly-incommensurable transgressions simply by measuring how much of a boost they give to your magic. Somewhere out there, some enterprising wizard is attempting to devise a pair of trousers that’s literally worse than murder.)

You mean these?

I think I’m out of my depth here.

Photo

Tue, 19 Jun 2018 03:47:57 -0400

D&D Classes, Simplified

Tue, 19 Jun 2018 03:43:10 -0400

eponymous-rose:

Playing 5th edition for the first time and feeling overwhelmed? Here’s a quick glimpse into the classes.

Barbarian

Fundamentally: It’s like when you step on a Lego in the middle of the night and for a moment your capacity for rational thought is eclipsed by the fact that the entire world must tremble before the unfathomable depths of your wrath. Only with fewer Legos and more swords and stuff.

Mechanically: You can go into a rage in battle that diminishes the damage you take and increases the damage you deal. A lot of your fighting is based on high-risk, high-reward strategies, intimidation, and instinct rather than careful calculation.

Bard

Fundamentally: The words you speak change the shape of the minds around you. You’ve taken motivational speaking to a whole new level. You can also insult someone so hard they die from it.

Mechanically: Your day-to-day repertoire of spells stays the same (once you’ve learned a spell, it tends to stick in your head) and also pulls from a lot of different specializations. You can also inspire your allies, mess with your enemies’ morale, and, yes, insult someone so hard they die from it.

Cleric

Fundamentally: You’re pretty tight with some sort of higher power who’s granted you abilities commensurate with their sphere of influence. You might be a warm and fuzzy beacon of light and love, you might heal the sick, or you might make swarms of insects descend on your screaming foes. God stuff, you know?

Mechanically: You have access to a huge number of spells but don’t know them all off by heart, so every morning you spend some time in prayer and contemplation to make sure a few of them are ready at your fingertips when you need them most.

Druid

Fundamentally: You can turn into animals and control a lot of powerful magic that’s tied in with nature and the elements. You also may have read too many Animorphs books as a kid.

Mechanically: Much like clerics, you have a huge number of spells potentially at your disposal but have to concentrate each morning on picking out which ones you’ll pack with you. You can also, you know, turn into animals. That’s a thing.

Fighter

Fundamentally: You probably watch a lot of action movies and wince every time a character pulls off an amazing fight despite not having any experience or training. You’ve worked very hard to learn strategy, tactics, and precision, and when the stars align, the whole battlefield is yours to control.

Mechanically: Depending on your specialty, you’ll have a variety of abilities to make combat go a little more smoothly for you and your friends: taunting enemies so they focus on the right people, shielding your squishier allies, or just doling out an absurd amount of hurt.

Monk

Fundamentally: You think people get a little weird about their swords; you’ve never needed more than just your fists and maybe a good stick. You’re highly trained and absurdly dexterous: if someone tries to pull a coin out from behind your ear, they’ll probably find themselves with a rabbit in their hand instead and no idea what happened.

Mechanically: You’re so quick that you can snatch arrows out of mid-air. You’re also very centered on precise, devastating strikes, and have a store of ki points that allow you to do special attacks/defenses.

Paladin

Fundamentally: While clerics are generally a little more buddy-buddy or reverential with their divine patrons, yours is something more of an… employer. You know how it is when you’re on the clock: sometimes you gotta do your best to be the good you want to see in the world, and sometimes you gotta swear to enact vengeance for ancient wrongs. It’s a living.

Mechanically: Your singularly goal-oriented abilities are a blend between magic and more traditional combat, and you can frequently use magic spells to imbue weaponry with divine power. You also have an impressive ability to suss out both strong good and strong evil.

Ranger

Fundamentally: You know the wilderness pretty darn well (and probably complain about weekend hikers a lot). Your idea of a good time is being dropped in the woods without a map and having to puzzle your way out, preferably while hunting a few monstrosities along the way…

Mechanically: Your experience and survival instincts will serve you especially well in particular regions (a favored terrain you select) and against particular enemies (a favored type you select). You pick up a bit of magic here and there, mainly to help yourself and your friends make it through the wilderness unscathed.

Rogue

Fundamentally: You’re a very sneaky person who figures the best battle is the one that you ensure is over before it even gets a chance to start… mostly because you know if you get cornered you’ll probably get squashed like a bug. It’s probably a good thing that you’re so stealthy you practically vanish into another dimension.

Mechanically: You get huge bonuses and incentives for attacking first or when an opponent is distracted. You’re also notoriously quick-fingered and can be assured that if something ever goes missing, every eye in the room is going to be looking at you. Whoops.

Sorcerer

Fundamentally: You’ve got some powerful magical abilities that just sort of… happen, and your control over them is a little shaky at best. But it’s fine, it’s all good, you’ve got it handled. That tree was always on fire, right?

Mechanically: You learn a limited selection of powerful spells that are always at your disposal, and also gain access to a pool of Sorcery Points that will let you further manipulate your magic as you get more and more comfortable with your spellcasting.

Warlock

Fundamentally: Some incredibly shifty and absurdly powerful ancient being decided you seemed kind of neat, so they were all, “Hey, how would you like to have some seriously freaky magic in exchange for making a sorta dodgy pact with me?” and you were all, “alksdjflgk???” because hey, otherworldly and unfathomable, and they were all, “Cool, have fun,” and now you can kill things with your brain.

Mechanically: You have an extremely limited number of very powerful spells, but your spellcasting recharges very quickly, since the channel between you and the source of your magical abilities is pretty darn open. You also made a pact with something strange and a little bit unknowable. What could go wrong?

Wizard

Fundamentally: You’re the kind of person who got all A’s in school but also studied their ass off to do it. It’s like you read Harry Potter so many times that you managed to will magic into existence. You’re probably going to drag the party to every used bookstore on the planet.

Mechanically: You have a spellbook that contains every spell you know. Every day, you have to study up on a handful of these spells that you want to have immediately at your fingertips. You can add to the spellbook by finding more spells out in the world and copying them down using fancy-ass stationery.

wearemage: Blood Power by conorburkeart

Mon, 18 Jun 2018 17:26:02 -0400

wearemage:

Blood Power by conorburkeart

advanced-procrastination: earlploddington: freshest-tittymilk: ...

Mon, 18 Jun 2018 17:18:30 -0400

advanced-procrastination:

earlploddington:

freshest-tittymilk:

prime89:

nightinngales:

bruh…

Wait, if their names are puns on their power, then Violet is ultraviolet which is invisible to the human eye.

SHUT UP.

13 years

Y'all are gonna flip your shit when i tell you about Dash

transcoranic: demenior: Every time I see a ‘modern au’ ft a character that has some sort of limb...

Mon, 18 Jun 2018 17:18:13 -0400

transcoranic:

demenior:

Every time I see a ‘modern au’ ft a character that has some sort of limb replacement like a metal arm or w/e and the ‘cool au version’ of it is a sleeve tattoo I literally want to reach through the screen and slap some sense into whoever posted it

They got a prosthetic in canon they gonna get a prosthetic in the au!!!! Because, I know this is a little far-fetched, but people who need prosthetics actually exist!!! In real life?! What a coincidence?!

Also you want cool prosthetics??? They totally exist

Want your character to have a cool prosthetic in the modern day?

steampunk? check

#aesthetic? Floral?

avant garde?

cyberpunk?

there are no excuses for erasing canonical disabilities